How to Choose the Perfect Wedding Venue

Of all the decisions you will make as a couple, the wedding venue is the big one. It sets your date, your budget and the backdrop to every photo you keep. The trouble is that a viewing is easy to be swept along by, and the questions you should have asked only occur to you in the car on the way home. So here is the list. Every question worth asking a wedding venue before you book, grouped so you can work through them on a viewing, and each one answered honestly for The BarnYard so you can see what a straight answer looks like.

We are a wedding venue, so we have a horse in this race. But these questions apply wherever you end up. We would genuinely rather you choose the right venue for you than book the wrong one and regret it. Take the list with you to every viewing, ours included. The answers tell you as much about a venue's honesty as its facilities.

Start hereThe space and capacity

How many guests can you actually hold?

Ask for real numbers, seated and standing, for each space. At The BarnYard, the Arboretum, our all-season glass pavilion, seats up to 200 for a wedding breakfast with a further 100 evening guests, so up to 300 across the day. The Apple Barn, our converted rustic barn, holds up to 180. Our Intimate package hosts up to 30. A room that is right for 200 will swallow 60, and a room that is right for 60 will cram 120, so match the space to your list, not the other way round.

Is there a minimum number of guests?

Most venues have one and not all of them volunteer it. Ours varies by season: the Traditional Arboretum package starts at 50 adult guests in the quieter months, rising to 60 in the warmer months and up to 80 for a peak summer Saturday. If your list is small, ask about packages built for smaller numbers before you rule a venue out. Our Intimate package exists for exactly that reason.

Will it work in winter as well as summer?

Photos on venue websites are nearly always taken in June. Ask what the space is like in February. The Arboretum is a permanent glass pavilion built for every season, with three crystal chandeliers, warm white fairy lights and bi-folding glass doors that close snugly against the weather, and the Apple Barn is fully heated, so the rustic option is not just a summer one. In December the Arboretum is dressed for Christmas throughout the month.

Will the venue be exclusively ours?

Ask this one plainly and listen for a plain answer. At The BarnYard, our Signature package is full private hire: every building and outdoor space, with the restaurant closed to the public. Our other packages give you private use of the Arboretum and its surrounding gardens. We are a large estate with several separate spaces, so on busier days more than one celebration can run here, always kept completely apart, each with its own areas and its own team. If total exclusivity matters to you, the Signature package is the honest answer.

Can we see it set up for a real wedding?

An empty room takes imagination. Ask about open days, when the spaces are dressed as they would be on the day, or whether a viewing can be arranged just before a wedding is due. We run wedding open days for exactly this, and viewings are easy to book at any time of year.

Saying I doThe ceremony

Are you licensed for civil ceremonies?

If the venue is licensed, you can marry and celebrate in one place, with no convoy of cars between a ceremony and a reception. The BarnYard is fully licensed for civil ceremonies and partnerships for up to 200 guests, depending on the setting you choose, and the ceremony is included in all four of our packages.

What ceremony settings can we choose from?

More settings mean more ways to make the day yours, and a better wet-weather plan. Full-day Arboretum weddings choose from five: the outdoor Lavender Walk Gazebo, reached along a stone aisle beneath wisteria and roses; the outdoor Orchard Garden Gazebo with views across the orchards; the festoon-lit Courtyard, framed by our original barns; a dedicated ceremony area inside the Arboretum, screened from the wedding breakfast; or the fairy-lit Apple Barn itself, for an additional charge from £750. Twilight and Intimate weddings marry in the Apple Barn or out in the Courtyard, which carries a £250 charge on the Intimate package. You can see every setting here.

What happens if it rains?

Do not accept "we'll sort something." Ask to stand in the wet-weather option and decide whether you would be happy marrying there, because you genuinely might be. At The BarnYard a gazebo ceremony moves to the dedicated ceremony area inside the Arboretum, which has curved bi-folding glass doors and the same orchard views, while Apple Barn and Courtyard ceremonies have the barn itself as their shelter. The ceremony always goes ahead, rain or shine.

Who conducts the ceremony, and who books them?

Civil ceremonies at The BarnYard are conducted by a registrar from the Kent Registrars. We book your ceremony with them on your behalf, so that is one thing off your list. Their fee is paid to the Registrars directly and is separate from anything The BarnYard charges. You will also need to give notice of marriage at your own local register office, and our team will remind you when.

Can we write our own vows and choose our own music?

Yes. A civil ceremony can include personal vows, non-religious readings and your chosen music, through our PA system or a small live ensemble. The registrar will guide you on what is and is not permitted. If you are weighing up a civil ceremony against a church wedding, we have written an honest comparison of the two.

How long does the ceremony take?

Most run between 20 and 40 minutes, depending on readings, music and personal touches. It is worth knowing because it shapes the timings of everything that follows, from canapés to the wedding breakfast.

From the kitchenFood and drink

Who actually cooks the food?

This is the difference between an all-inclusive venue and a dry-hire one, and it changes your planning completely. At The BarnYard everything is cooked fresh on site by our own kitchen team, using locally sourced and homegrown ingredients where possible, including fruit from our own orchards. If a venue brings in outside caterers, ask who they are, whether you can taste the food first, and who you call if something goes wrong.

Can we choose our menu?

Yes. You build your wedding breakfast from our full menu of starters, mains and desserts, or choose a daytime BBQ instead. The standard package is one menu for all guests. If you would like to offer everyone a choice of two options per course, that is available at £7.50 per head, with guests pre-selecting in advance. Your menu is finalised at your wedding meeting, and our foodie's guide to the wedding breakfast walks through the whole menu.

Can you cater for dietary requirements?

Any decent venue should say yes without hesitation. We cater for vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, nut-free and dairy-free guests as a matter of course. Confirm everything at your final wedding meeting and every guest will be looked after.

What drinks are included, and can we bring our own?

Our full-day all-inclusive packages include a drinks package: half a bottle of wine per person, mineral water on every table and a glass of Prosecco for the toast, with Champagne available as an upgrade. Outside alcohol is not permitted, so there is no corkage because there is nothing to cork. All drinks come from our fully licensed bar, and if there is a particular drink you would love for your guests, tell us and we will do our best to bring it in.

Is there a charge to cut the cake?

Ask this at every venue, because cake-cutting fees are one of the classic quiet extras. Here the answer is no. Your cake is announced as part of the evening and cut and served by our team at no cost.

What about evening food?

Check whether evening food is included and for how many. Ours is included for all of your daytime guests plus up to 20 additional evening guests, with any beyond that catered at £20 per head. A venue that feeds only half your evening crowd leaves the other half queuing for a taxi to the nearest chip shop.

The honest numbersMoney and payment

What does it actually cost?

There is no single figure anywhere, because price moves with the package, the guest count, the day of the week and the season. As a guide, our Traditional Arboretum package starts from £6,750 for a Sunday to Thursday in the quieter months and rises to around £15,950 for a Saturday in peak summer. Twilight starts from £3,450 venue hire with catering priced separately, and Intimate starts from £5,000. All prices include VAT. We have written a whole article on what a BarnYard wedding actually costs, because this question deserves more than a paragraph.

What exactly is included in that price?

This is the big one. Two venues quoting the same headline figure can mean wildly different things once the add-ons appear. Our Traditional package covers venue hire from 9:15am to midnight, canapés, a welcome drink, the three-course wedding breakfast or daytime BBQ, the drinks package, evening food, all the furniture and styling (tables, Chiavari chairs, white linen, china, crystal glassware, chandeliers and fairy lights), uniformed waiting and bar staff, an informal toastmaster, a personalised BarnYard wedding sign to keep, and our Leave in Luxury transport service at the end of the night. Ask every venue for their equivalent list in writing.

Are there any hidden fees?

Ask directly and watch how the venue answers. Corkage, cake-cutting charges, supplier fees and surprise overtime are all real things that happen at venues across the UK. Here: no corkage, no cake-cutting charge, and no fee for your photographer, florist or band to be on site. The one common extra is the late bar licence, £550 for an extra hour or £350 for half an hour, and that is arranged with you in advance, never sprung on you mid-evening.

How does the payment schedule work?

You should never be guessing when the next bill lands. Our structure is £1,250 to secure your date, a second payment of £2,750 for full-day weddings, and the final balance no later than six weeks before the day. We also offer payment plans, which we are happy to talk through at your viewing.

What is refundable and what is not?

The reservation fee is non-refundable, as it secures your date and covers the planning work that starts straight away. The £500 damage deposit, taken with your final balance, is refunded in full after the wedding provided there is no damage. Whichever venue you choose, take out wedding insurance. We recommend it to every couple.

Do you charge for children?

Worth asking if your list has little ones on it. At The BarnYard, children aged 0 to 4 are free of charge and still catered for, and children aged 5 to 11 are charged at half the adult package price.

After darkThe evening

What time does the music stop?

Every venue has a licence and a cut-off, and it is far better to know it now than at 11pm on the night. Ours: the bar closes and music stops at 11:30pm, with carriages by midnight. If you want to keep going, a late bar extension is available, £550 for an hour or £350 for half an hour, booked in advance.

Can we bring our own DJ or band?

Yes. We have a list of recommended suppliers who know the venue inside out, and you are welcome to bring your own. External suppliers simply need public liability insurance of at least £5 million and PAT-tested equipment, which any professional will have. Ask every venue whether they charge suppliers to attend. We do not.

How do our guests get home?

We do not have bedrooms on site, so this question matters and we would rather answer it upfront. Our local hotels and taxi companies guide covers where guests stay and how they get back there, and our Leave in Luxury service takes you and your VIPs home in style at the end of the night on the Traditional package.

Can the celebration carry on the next morning?

A lovely question that few couples think to ask. If your guests are staying nearby, you can gather again for a BarnYard Breakfast in our oak-beamed restaurant the morning after, easily the most relaxed part of the whole weekend. The restaurant is open Wednesday to Sunday, so check the day your date lands on and book ahead for a group.

The small print of the dayPractical details

Is there parking?

Two large free car parks, right by the venue. If a venue is short on parking, ask where guests actually leave their cars, because somebody has to be the one who parks half a mile away.

Where do we get ready?

Ask whether there is somewhere on site for the morning, because getting ready together at the venue removes a whole layer of transport stress. We have two dressing suites, The Blossom and The Hyde Out, so both partners can get ready at The BarnYard on the morning of the wedding.

Is the venue accessible?

The Arboretum and the restaurant have step-free access and accessible toilets, and the main ceremony and event areas are all reachable step-free. The one exception is the Mezzanine, which is upstairs. Tell us about any specific requirements when you enquire and we will plan around them, and expect the same willingness from any venue you visit.

Can our dog be part of the day?

We are a pet-loving venue. Well-behaved dogs can be part of your wedding day by arrangement, and dogs are always welcome in the Courtyard for restaurant dining. They are not allowed inside the main buildings otherwise, so agree the details with the team in advance.

Who looks after us, before and on the day?

Ask who your point of contact is, and whether the person you meet at the viewing will be there on the day. Our wedding team guides you from your first showround to your final meeting, your planning runs through SONAS, our online portal, where you confirm numbers and book extras, and on the day itself we act as your informal toastmaster, quietly keeping everything on time so you do not have to.

When do we confirm the final details?

Your final wedding meeting for an Arboretum wedding is held twelve weeks before the day, where you confirm guest numbers, menu choices and timings. Knowing the deadline early makes the last stretch of planning far calmer.

Trust your gutThe question only you can answer

For all thirty-odd questions above, there is one that no venue can answer for you. Somewhere on a viewing, often surprisingly early, a venue either starts to feel like yours or it does not. Pay attention to that. The spreadsheet matters, but so does the feeling of standing in the space and picturing your people in it.

Choosing a venue should feel exciting, not exhausting. Take this list, visit a few places, ask the awkward questions and trust the one that answers them plainly and still feels like you the moment you walk in. If that happens to be us, we would love to show you around the orchards and talk through your day, no pressure, no hard sell. Just book a relaxed viewing and come and see.